55 Hilarious Eye Puns

Get ready to enjoy our hilarious selection of eye puns that will make your day blinky! with the funny eye puns and eye jokes with eye one liners, let the laughter begin!

Here are the top 55 Hilarious eye puns to make your weekend with a laugh. These are the funniest jokes about eye humor for both kids and adults which they are going to love with a laugh.

Eye Puns

1. Why can’t your eyes play baseball? They can’t catch flies!
2. The optometrist fell into the lens grinder and made a spectacle of himself!
3. Why don’t eyes tell jokes to each other? Because they might cornea another!
4. My friend got poked in the eye playing basketball. Now he has court vision.
5. I went to the eye doctor the other day. Turns out I have vision!
6. How does Moses make tea? Hebrews it!
7. I told my eye doctor he has his work cut out for him. He didn’t seem amused.
8. I was going to tell an eye test pun but I couldn’t read ahead.
9. My optometrist told me I have astigmatism. I said “I find that very flastigmating!”
10. Did you hear about the man who got poked in the eye with a lime? He ended up getting lime disease!
11. Why are eyes so lazy in the morning? They don’t want to open up and expose their redness!
12. Why don’t eyelids play tennis together? They don’t make a good pair!
13. Want to hear a construction joke? Still working on it…just keep your eyes peeled!
14. My friend can wink his right eye but not his left eye. On the other hand…

Funny Eye Puns

15. I was going to tell an eye test pun, but I couldn’t read ahead.
16. My eyes are the only part of my body that kisses each other. Talk about self-love!
17. My friend asked to borrow money from me. I told her, “Not making eye contact right now!”
18. Did you hear about the bisexual optometrist? He was into bothSpecs!
19. Why are a footballer’s eyes so squinty? Years of ball gazing into the sun!
20. My friend poked me in the eye. Let’s just say he caught me off guard!
21. Did you hear about the band “The Eye Doctors”? You’ll probably need to see it to believe it!
22. My eyes and my stomach should join a band together. One’s always hungry, and the other is always fooding around!
23. The eye doctor told me I have astigmatism. I found that very flastigmating!
24. I went to the eye doctor and turns out I have vision. Imagine that!
25. My friend got poked in the eye playing basketball. Now he has court vision!
26. I couldn’t figure out why my contact lens prescription was making my vision worse. Turns out I had my contacts in backwards!
27. What do you call a detective with no eyes? No-eye-dea!

Eye Jokes

28. I was going to make an eyeball joke, but it’s cornea.
29. The pirate had an eye patch over each eye. He just wasn’t seeing things clearly!
30. I heard an amusing joke about eyeglasses, but I can’t really see the humor in it.
31. Why don’t hands ever play hide and seek with eyes? Because they always get caught red-handed!
32. Did you hear about the claustrophobic optometrist? He was scared of tight spaces!
33. Why don’t skeptics make good optometrists? They second-glasses everything!
34. I went to the eye doctor, but he said I can’t have LASIK. I don’t have the cornea thickness!
35. Did you hear about the new restaurant called Pupils? It serves all kinds of eye food!
36. Want to hear a joke about optometry? The joke’s on you – I don’t have anything!
37. Why couldn’t the little boy see the pirate movie? Because it was rated ARRRR!
38. Did you hear about the restaurant Chef Eyes? He cooks delicious dishes for the eyes!
39. My friend got a job harvesting corneal tissues. He says the work has its perks!
40. What did the left eye say to the right eye? Between you and me, something smells!
41. What did the eye say to the finger? I’ve got my eye on you!
42. Did you hear about the restaurant “See Food”? It’s got food for the eyes!
43. What disease do you get when you’re poked in the eye with citrus fruit? Lime disease!
44. I tried putting my contact lens in with a map. It turns out there is no eye-land!
45. What did the eye doctor say when he finished his lunch? Time to go back to work and make more cornea!

Eye One Liners

46. What do you call someone who blinks a lot? Eyelash!
47. How did the brain react when the eyes took a vacation? It couldn’t “see” the point of it!
48. Somebody made an eyeglass joke but I can’t see the humor in it!
49. I tried catching fog yesterday but I mist.
50. What happens if you sit on your eyeglasses? It makes your bottom hurt!
51. The optometrist checked my eyes, shrugged and said “I could have sworn you had vision!”
52. Why do seagulls fly over the sea? Because if they flew over the bay, they’d be called bay-gulls!
53. I tried to catch some fog yesterday but I mist!
54. I got LASIK eye surgery but I still can’t see that well. I should have used hindsight!
55. Did you hear about the claustrophobic optometrist? He was scared of tight spaces!

I hope these eye puns bring a smile to your face! Enjoy the eye humor!

Final Thoughts

We brought you hilarious eye puns and humor, Keep these jokes in mind, and remember to smile because these can be really winky! and can be a source of laughter too! Hope these jokes bring joy to your world!

If you want to laugh more here is a list of more funny jokes which you gonna love and laugh at:

• Cricket Jokes
• Cranberry Puns
• Wedding Jokes